Healthy Relationships: Ways to Avoid Psychological Bullying and Manipulation

Psychological bullying is pervasive; however, there are ways to identify and handle manipulative people who use others for personal agendas. Psychological manipulation can be described as “undue influence” through emotional abuse and mental exploitation, with the intention to gain power, control, advantages at a targeted person’s expense.

Whether it’s spiritual, pastoral, platonic, intimate, family, business, or friends, all healthy relationships involve love, respect, and, mutual concern for the well being of the other person. Most people experience healthy reciprocation of giving and taking. It occurs when there’s a balanced exchange of benefits and privileges. However, when there’s an imbalance in what is exchanged emotionally, psychologically, physically, spiritually, or financially by parties, one person is being psychologically manipulated and is used for the benefit of another. The manipulator intentionally devises a plan that creates unfair leverage of power, and exploits the targeted person for the purposes of fulfilling or accomplishing his or her plan of action.

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ABC’s 20/20 recently did a story about how millions of people who are hurting and in difficult situations are manipulated by psychics, readers, witchcraft workers, and, witches everyday. People spend millions of dollars seeking answers to heart felt questions that they never get. Take a look at 20/20’s story: http://abcnews.go.com/US/private-investigator-helped-recover-2m-psychic-fraud-victims/story?id=23348889.

God is THE only true, wholesome, full spectrum answer to your problems. You must always question the integrity of information when you are paying for it. Pick up the King James version of the Holy Bible and read, study, learn for yourself. Accept Jesus as your Lord & Savior and ask God to come into your life, and heart. Seek Him for help. In doing so, you will be comforted and you will find peace and love and ultimately answers. Oftentimes, you’re not ready for THE answer because you need to heal first. So, don’t press God for answers, rather, seek a wholesome personal relationship with Him. He will guide you from that time forward and you will never feel the need to seek answers elsewhere (especially if they require large sums of money).

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To identify people who bully psychologically or are manipulative, look for these characteristics:

1. Someone who seeks to learn your weaknesses right away and persist until they do;
2. Someone who uses your weaknesses to their advantage; and,
3. Someone who talks you into relinquishing something personal for their own personal gain.

YOU must stop the manipulator or the problem will only get worse. You reclaim self by first knowing your inherent rights as a human being. As long as you do not violate others, you have the right to defend yourself and protect your rights. Alternatively, if you violate others, you may forego these rights:

Not to be psychologically violated

To develop and maintain your own personal views and perspectives

To express your emotions and desires

To expect to be respected and treated the way you treat others

The right to prioritize and establish boundaries

To decline offers by either choosing to think about the offer prior to making a decision or simply saying no

Not to subject yourself to harm by removing self from a psychologically, mentally, physically, spiritually or emotionally abusive person or situation

To be free of torment, abuse, ongoing conflict and create an environment that enables you to be happy and healthy

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